Fact (mostly)

“Excuse me sir. Please silence your electronic device. I am trying to work over there and it’s disturbing me.”

“What if I turn it down?”

“It still emits scratchy noises audible from where I’m sitting. It’s best if you use earphones.”

“I don’t have any earphones.”

“I happen to have some. They are meant to be used in computer labs. Here you may have this one.” I offer a pair of earbud style earphones which I purchased from Amazon in bulk. Cost per pair, a little over fifty cents.

“I don’t want those things.”

“Okay, then just silence your device.”

“Why don’t you just go away?”

“Because your playing your device out loud annoys me.”

“Well, you’re annoying me. Go away.”

That’s a typical confrontation. There are many issues wrapped up in there. For me, there is a larger issue. Electronic devices are just another example of how many humans are two stupid to use technological advancements properly. A few well known inventions come to mind starting with alcohol.

Until the 19^th century, public drinking water carried too many health risks. The Romans built aqueducts to bring in fresh water and fountains helped remove sediment, but that really wasn’t enough to remove bacteria. Like the Egyptians and Greeks, Romans were well advised to boil their water. In the dark ages, most of Roman technology was lost and population centers grew. Boiling and/or filtering water was still necessary but providing sufficient quantities proved difficult.

Arround 1000 AD, the preferred method to provide sufficient potable liquid was fermentation, specifically, beer, but all forms of alcohol carried less danger from microbes (which wouldn’t be discovered for several more centuries).

Alcohol, as we all know, kills bacteria. That’s why we use rubbing alcohol to disinfect wounds and stave off COVID. The irony here, is that alcohol, is the product of bacteria or fungi eating sugars. That is to say, bacteria piss (in most cases, yeast, a fungus, is used do it’s mostly fungi piss, but bacteria piss is more fun to say). We kill bacteria with their own excrement.

Nowadays, we have very safe water supplies. Alcohol is now favored for its effects on the human brain, and many humans cannot handle it. About six percent of Americans have alcohol related disorders and America suffers from about eighty thousand alcohol related deaths every year (https://www.caron.org/blog/the-american-alcohol-problem#:~:text=Alcoholism%20Stats&text=More%20than%206%20percent%20of,year%20in%20the%20United%20States).

Automobiles are another technology humans haven’t quite grasped. Besides killing another forty thousand Americans annually, most people are not well served by the individual private automobiles they overuse. Surely in rural areas, cars are more practical than horses, but in urban and suburban areas an effective public transit network is much more beneficial.

In the early versions of SimCity, not building roads cut down on car to car shootings, taxes and many other problems. Just building public transit lets your city grow safer and with more room for parks and other quality of life establishments to compensate for the lack of individual private transportation. Otherwise, roads need to continually expand until they choke off housing and parks.

In the real world, many cities (including Billings, Charlotte, Chicago, New York, Palo Alto, San Francisco and Seattle https://highways.dot.gov/safety/other/road-diets) successfully enacted “road diets” to encourage public transit and improve public safety.

In Los Angeles, UPS suggested that restricting road usage would allow them to deliver packages at a lower rate (rather self serving, don’t you think). The same reasons, though, apply to police and fire department response times. There are no statistics on the number of lives lost due to traffic congestion delaying ambulances and first responders (at least not on the first page of my Google search), but several sites noted that traffic congestion as a factor.

In response to a slew of bicyclist and pedestrian deaths, LA Mayor Eric Garcetti tried to implement his Vision Zero program which included lowering speed limits and making streets safer which also included more bicycle lanes which, as a consequence, took lanes away from cars (road diet). It was met with considerable resistance. Without effective implementation, the pedestrian death rate kept increasing. In short, Angelinos much rather watch their children get run over by their neighbors than curtail their automobile abandon, an unhealthy addiction to the private car.

Modern smart phone usage also reveals human’s inability to adapt to new technologies in a reasonable manner. Distracted driving already revealed human stupidity using the first generation of this technology and there are plenty PSA and concerned organization commercials on TV for this. Hands free devices seemed to be a remedy, and, it was in part, there are many studies show that not using a smart phone at all is the better choice.

Most phones, before cell phones, have circuits to feed back microphone input to the earpiece so users could correctly modulate their volume. Mobile devices, at least in the earlier generations, did not. After a few years of mass cell phone use, there was a glut of discarded phones. Environmental issues aside, I was impressed that a local social worker gathered many of the older generation phones and convinced his mentally ill clients that when they talk to themselves or their imaginary friends, they should talk into the cell phone. That way, what was once threatening and abherent behavior now seemed like normal cell phone usage.

That’s, of course, is so early generation. It didn’t take long for Facetime, Skype and other video calling apps to, once again, give people incentive to misapply technology to the detriment of society. Now people hold their cell phones in front of their face with the other party on loud speaker. They seem oblivious to the fact they are in public and everyone within listening range, about a twenty foot radius, can now hear both sides of the conversation.

Fictional Account:

“I’m sorry, but we all don’t need to hear your conversation.”

“Mind your own business.” To her friend. “Sorry, but there are some weird people in this restaurant.”

The next time, I took out my cell phone which has a record app and, as obviously as I could, recorded her phone call.

“What are you doing?”

“Recording your phone call.”

“That’s an invasion of privacy.”

“Can’t be, your not keeping your phone call private. Not at all.”

“Manager! Manager! This man is invading my privacy!”

I was asked to leave the restaurant. I explained to the manager that I had no interest in invading her privacy, I was just trying to show her that she was not using her cell phone in an appropriate manner.

The next time I returned to the establishment, the manager sat at my table and explained to me that any recording, auditory or video, was against their policy. I asked to see their policy. She left and returned empty handed. I suggested that they craft and post their patron behavior expectations (normal people might just say policies) based on respectful behavior. It is already the case in California that proprietors are liable for patron behavior that violates the California and Fair Employment and Housing Act (basically all businesses may be held liable for any defined harassment like sexual harassment or racial harassment that occurs at their business whether the harasser is an employee or not). I suggested that they expand their expectations to include any overtly rude behavior including audio from their electronic devices. Basically if one patron feels compelled to complain about another patron, that patron should curtail their behavior. If they do not, the complaining patron should notify staff who will determine if the behavior rises to an actionable level. Staff need to be trained in this. They already should have passed harassment training, so this should be approached in much the same way. Electronic devices should be silenced. They are engineered for individual enjoyment without any concern for anyone else which is automatically rude and disrespectful.

Anyways, if a patron behaves disrespectfully, staff will inform them that their behavior is not tolerated in this restaurant. A little back talk is okay, but staff should not suffer any abuse, and people tend towards abusive when their behavior is challenged.

Abusive behavior and non compliance trigger them being asked to leave, and refusal to leave triggers a declaration of trespassing and a call to the police.

“So, what if both customers become abusive, you know, with each other?”

“Ask them both to leave.”

“But one of them started it.”

“The rules are, a polite request, then engage staff. If someone gets drawn into a disrespectful confrontation, then they should leave as well. You don’t want your staff to become referees. They can, with training, determine if a behavior is disrespectful, but they should not adjudicate a conflict between patrons.”

“But you were reacting to someone you thought misbehaved.”

“And you were right to ask me to leave.”

I returned a few weeks later. The manager walked me to a framed Dining Area Behavior Policy hanging near the restrooms. I thought it should be near the front entrance. Obviously, a lawyer crafted it. There were terms I did not recognize. I thought it should be more plain language. I did like that there were definitions of critical terms at the bottom. Most legal documents put that stuff up front.

End Fictional Account.

I never attempted to record someone’s phone conversation.

I like, or liked, to write at Panera. Food selections are wanting. McDonald’s is way more affordable and they also offer free wifi. Many other sit down restaurants offer better food at similar prices, but Panera offers a real nice environment: comfortable seating, good music, many of the tables had nearby electrical outlets and free wifi. The sip club is a real value, and there are enough food options to make writing breakfasts, lunches and even dinners pleasant.

For a while, McDonald’s and Starbucks had good environments (okay the short McDonald’s playlist made listening to the music for more than half an hour tiresome, but it looks like they lengthened their playlist to about an hour), but both of these places have waged a minor war against cyber-campers like myself. Both have removed electrical outlets. Easy to defeat; just buy a battery extender. Starbucks remodeled several of their locations to remove or reduce table space, For cyber-campers, including would be writers like me, Panera seemed like a last oasis.

Although I am generally quiet and keep to myself, there are cell-phone based campers who seek to consume entertainment rather than create it. They don’t really need the Panera environment. Their phones can connect to the internet anywhere, and their batteries should have sufficient charge. I guess Starbucks reduced table space and McDonald’s repetitious music may have driven them to Panera.

I do not think it coincidence that the loneliness crises exacerbated first with the internet and exploded with smart phone advancements. It was foreseeable. Smart phone advancements prey upon human weaknesses and insecurities. Why approach someone and try to relate with them on a human, social level when you can delve into streamed entertainment, virtual reality or pornography (yes, one guy at Starbucks used to stream porn on his cell phone. At least he used earphones, but occasionally staff would come by to wipe tables or sweep, notice what he was doing and kick him out).

It makes sense that those who substitute electronic interactions for social interactions would become rude and insensitive to actual people. It is another case of how people can not cope with technological advancements. Just as cigarette manufacturers were held liable for the damages they caused people, technology companies should be compelled to pay for reparations to our society. At the very least, they should stop preying on human frailties, but that’s another blog entry. Right now, the topic is people streaming media on their electronic devices and their invasion of Panera.

Although the interaction at the start of this entry was the most typical, the actual incident went more like this:

“Excuse me sir, your phone is too loud.”

“I just need five minutes, okay?”

“Okay.” I can tolerate a few minutes. It is important to be sensitive to other people’s needs.

Six minutes later, I approached the gentleman again. When I informed him that more than five minutes passed, he accosted me with a string of epithets, mostly vulgar. His general theme was that I had no right to disturb him. I pointed out that his electronic device was disturbing me. He started yelling, and I think I responded in kind, but I was cut off by a staff member and another patron. They separated us, and the patron escorted me back to my table. The staff member convinced the other guy to leave.

I stayed away from Panera for a few days. When I returned, the manager came to my table and told me that I should not approach other guests about their cell phones. I should get the manager. She didn’t even ask for my side of the story. I accepted her terms. A half hour later, A guy sat at the table next to me with a bag from the neighboring McDonald’s (remember, the value of Panera is its environment, not its menu). He started streaming media on his phone. I went to find the manager.

After waiting near the counter for five minutes, she came out to see me. I explained about the guy at the next table streaming media out loud. I did not mention the McDonald’s food.

“I’ll ask him to turn it down.”

“He’s three feet away. In my experience, phones, even at low levels, are still distracting. The best solution is to silence the device.”

“I’ll be back.”

“I will not ask him to silence the device.”

I had to think about this. People who stream media are as likely to utilize the Panera environment as long as I do.

“Then I have to leave.”

In essence, Panera choose a person, who bought his food elsewhere, rudely playing media on his electronic over a long time and frequent customer who, other than complaining about other’s rude behavior, kept quite and behaved respectfully. Panera prefers rudeness. An odd position for an establishment whose main attraction is the environment it provides its patrons. I was declared a second class citizen at Panera (other people had the right to annoy me, but I could not address them myself), or at least, I was treated like one.

I had paid for their annual Sip Club membership which would take effect the beginning of the next month. I thought it would save money. I wrote a complaint about the incident. I couldn’t fit all the details into the limited space they allow, so I informed them that there was more to the story.

Panera responded:

November 15,

Hi <my real name, redacted>,

Thanks for taking the time to reach out. We acknowledge and apologize for the inconvenience. I would be disappointed, too. If I would go to a noisy place. That’s certainly not the level of service we strive for, and we’re glad you gave us an opportunity to address your concerns.

To help make your next visit better, I just added a free pastry reward to your MyPanera account and it will be available for 60 days! Keep in mind that change isn’t given for rewards, so it must be redeemed completely in a single visit.

I want to assure you that your comments will be shared with the regional leadership team overseeing this location to ensure your voice is heard, and help bring about a positive change within the bakery-café.

To see your new reward, simply follow these steps:

• Log in to your MyPanera account.

• Click on “Your Rewards”, directly to the right of “Hi [Your Name]”

• Scroll down until you see the “Your Offers” section, slightly below “Your Rewards”

Again, we appreciate you sharing your thoughts with us, David.

Sincerely,

Brenda

Panera Bread Guest Care

Note the “I want to assure you that your comments will be shared with the regional leadership team overseeing this location to ensure your voice is heard, and help bring about a positive change within the bakery-café.” As you see, this was heading into the holiday season, so I waited a long time for a followup. During that time, I stayed away from Panera as I saw it as an unsafe place to go. If more rude people came in and played their electronic devices, I would have to leave. As I am disabled and dependent on public transportation, switching locations is not easy. Yes, there is a McDonald’s next door, but McDonald’s is also a magnet for rude people, and since it cost less, way less, more people can afford to rude at McDonald’s.

In late January, I wrote:

Brenda, Panera Customer Bread Guest Care,

What was the result of the regional leadership team review of my comments? I have not used my sip club membership since this instance, only bought some bagels to help get me through recent storms. I would like to return to my local Panera, but still feel that I will be driven out by customers’ annoying electronic devices.

<My real name, redacted>

There was no response. So in February, I asked for my Sip Club membership to be refunded.

Panera responded:

Feb 27,

Hi <redacted>,

Thanks for taking the time to reach out! We don’t have a specific policy on the volume of guest’s personal devices in the cafe, and the decision is ultimately left to café discretion. Next time you visit your local café, we recommend speaking with a café manager about this – they’ll be happy to help.

I have reviewed your refund request for your Annual Unlimited Sip Club Subscription charge. I’m so sorry for any inconvenience – we are not able to process your subscription refund request as per the terms and conditions you agreed to during enrollment nor transition your account to the monthly subscription after payment is collected.

Would you like assistance in canceling your subscription so you will not have a renewal fee on October 19th?

Thanks again, David. We hope you get a chance to visit soon.

Sincerely,

Jade

Panera Bread Guest Care

Also in the “terms and conditions” is an implied agreement that any dispute between Annual Sip Club members and Panera have to be resolved by binding arbitration. In binding arbitration, each party has to pay half the fee of the arbiter, approximately $1500. Best case scenario: I win the arbitration and I’m out only $1400. Like most people, I can not/will not throw away $1400 just to make a point, and I bet Panera banks on that. So very rude. No wonder they side with rude patrons.

Throughout this whole thing, no-one from Panera ever bothered to get my side of the story. They offer free pastries without considering that diabetics can not take advantage of free pastries, and, except for plain croissants, pastries at Panera seemed to be laced with sugar. Building and maintaining good patron/customer/guest relations takes getting to know each one. It’s rude to act upon assumptions, but that’s what Panera did in every step of this. I’m not sure how hashtags work, I’m not on any social media platform, but here goes: #PaneraSoRude.